How You Can Help

If you read my blog on a regular basis this is very similar to the second half of my last post, Pissed Off But Hopeful.

I chatted with my wonderful friend the other night and I realized that I should share some of the things I told her. While I spoke with her I shared what she can do to help me and I also expressed what I do not expect from her. I thought it would be helpful to share it with all of you.

I understand that most people do not understand depression. I understand that most people do not understand why I cannot just feel better, why I cannot just put a smile on my face and think positively. I don’t expect you to understand.

I do not expect people to have the “right” thing to say to me. There is no “right” thing. I just want you to listen to me. You can tell me you love me and that you care about me. It also really helps me when you tell me why you love me and like me. It is easy in the middle of depression to not be able to see yourself clearly. I often feel lousy and worth very little. I feel like I am no fun, a burden, and not all that likeable. Therefore, it is very helpful for you to remind me why you like and love me.

People can also pray for me and with me. God is powerful. He hears and answers prayers. I don’t always understand why he doesn’t answer them right away but he does answer them.

Jesus said, "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.—Luke 11:9.

God’s word also says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and will bring you back from captivity. –Jeremiah 29:11-14

You can call, text, or write just to say hello and that you care about me. Those messages are so helpful. They make me feel loved, give me hope and remind me what I am fighting for.

I understand that it is not always easy to talk to me on the phone. I realize that this (depression) is old news. It is ok if you don’t feel like talking to me because it is exhausting and depressing to you. I get that. A simple “I love you and I am thinking of you” message does wonders for me. The last thing I want to be is a burden to those whom I love.

I also love to hear about all the good things going on in my friends and families lives. Please do not feel that you cannot talk to me about your life because it will make me feel worse. It fills me with joy to hear about those I love thriving and doing well. Also don’t feel like you cannot talk to me about your problems. All problems big or small are real and have very real emotions attached to them. I want to be your friend. I want to listen and encourage you. If you are hurting I want to hurt with you. If you are stressed out I want to listen to you vent. So please don’t hold back with me.

There is really only one bad thing you can say to me. And that is; “just get over it.” I would love to do just that but for whatever reason it is just not that simple.

I want to thank all of you who take the time to read this blog. Thank you to all my friends and family who are supporting, loving and praying for me right now. I have a great deal of hope today. I am a fighter. I will continue to fight until the battle is won. One of my mottos right now is that tomorrow is a new day. “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning”. –Psalm 30:5 Yay for new days!